Happy hellish holiday

Is this hell, or is this a holiday camp? – my happy hellish holiday

Is this hell, or is this a holiday camp? Welcome to my happy hellish holiday. I love great british holidays. It’s all I’ve ever really known aside from a med cruise we took to celebrate getting my first job. I’m about to share with you my warped and twisted view of my surroundings at a british holiday camp. On this occasion we visited Haven, and it was amazing. They all pretty much follow the same script though. Enjoy.

It’s like something out of any sane person’s nightmares. Kids running at you from different directions as if running from an incoming asteroid. Taking it in turns to scream and cry. Or so it seems on face value. You can’t hear them as their screams are drowned out by the sound of cheesy pop tunes from the 90’s. All the classics are their. Steps, Busted, Cotton eye Joe and 5ive. Ah gotta love the dance move era. It’s a total cheese fest.

happy hellish holiday

The kids have been on the go all day. Like greyhounds in the race trap, that caravan door bursts open at 9am and they are off. Park, swimming, beach, amusements, repeat on a loop until one by one they flake out.

But what are they running on? Never you fear, here in hell they have an endless supply of fruit shoots, slushies, chips and nuggets, all washed down with a bucket of candy floss and a bag of sweets. Your kids will be on the most epic sugar rush and you’ll be there to take the tantrums and meltdowns as the rush wears off.

happy hellish holiday

But what about you, poor naive parents? Who innocently booked this ticket to hell thinking it would be fun. Heck they sold it to you as a holiday! Never fear, after spending a restless night sleeping in a freezing caravan on a mattress filled with rubble, you will be feeling on top of your game…..no? This is where your resistance to alcohol disables and you suddenly feel the urge to down pints of cider and glasses of wine. After watching the kids eat their body weight in nuggets, burgers and chips, you can’t bear the sight of anymore. So your food sustenance shall be Sahara nuts and krax snax crisps.

Joking aside, we’ve just spent a blissful week in a prestige Caravan at Haven Doniford Bay in Somerset. It was incredibly amazing to say the least and my satirical observations were made whilst slightly tipsy.

happy hellish holiday

What are your experiences of holiday camps? We all know there’s a little bit of hell in there somewhere. Don’t we?

Checkout the haven site now. We booked using The Daily Mail £15 holidays and upgraded to a prestige on arrival. Vouchers can also collected for cheaper holidays from The Sun on the £9.50 deal. Both tend to be term time though. Haven, Doniford Bay

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

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47 Comments on "Is this hell, or is this a holiday camp? – my happy hellish holiday"

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Andrea @ Topsy Turvy Tribe
Guest

Ha ha, yes! We have stayed at a couple of holiday parks, our boys are a little bit younger but I’m pretty sure we went through it all! You’ve got to love it! #KCACOLS

That Mummy Blog
Guest

Aha, sounds hellish and fun at the same time?! We haven’t been on a family holiday yet, but are due our first CAMPING trip in a few weeks time – wish us luck! #kcacols

Lydia C. Lee
Guest

We’ve never been to one – but it does sound like the kids love it #KCACOLS

Jenny (Accidental Hipster Mum)
Guest

We’ve never been on holiday as a family so I have no experience. Perhaps I’m not missing out on all that much? Haha x

#KCACOLS

Jenn @ Mad Mommy
Guest

I’ve never had the pleasure of experiencing such a thing, good or bad. #KCACOLS

Lisa (mumdadplus4)
Guest

I used to go to Haven all the time as a kid and exactly as you say out first thing and back at tea before back to the evening entertainment. They are just not like they used to be though or certainly not as I remember them anyway. Still great holidays for families though #KCACOLS

Crummy Mummy
Guest

We had our first experience of a holiday camo last summer & loved it! We’re going back this year! #KCACOLS

Sarah - Arthurwears
Guest

Ive got to be honest, we spent every summer holiday growing up on a campsite, either in a caravan, in an awning attached to a caravan or in a tent…as soon as i had the choice of where to go and what to do as a holiday I kissed the idea of camping goodbye….even now and then when i feel nostalgic and id love for Arthur to experience it one day, my husband cant stand camping so i think id have a fight on my hands #kcacols

Bread
Guest

Never been to a Haven, though I did go to Butlins when I was a kid. Don’t remember much about it though. It was in Skeggy. It rained. Other than that I’m at a loss. Maybe we’ll take Snappy to a holiday camp. It’ll be a good experience for my American wife too. #kcacols

five little doves
Guest

We’ve done holiday camps for the last four years and they’ve been great, but also had their hellish moments too! This year we are renting our own private cottage, I feel like I need a break from the chaos of a holiday camp for one year at least! #kcacols

Susie / S.H.I.T.
Guest

This is hilarious – I can just see the kids like greyhounds, champing at the bit to get out there into the mentalness. And you appearing bleary eyed having had the sleep from hell. Bet pints of cider are the only way forward! #KCACOLS

Mainy
Guest

Oh we have done a few now and for younger kids I think they really are a good choice. Not an ideal relaxing holiday for me ( I dream of sun loungers and a good book!) but still good for the kids and getting away for a bit:)
Mainy
#KCACOLS

Becky Clark
Guest

We did lots of holiday park holidays when we were kids and I have such wonderful memories. In fact I’m actually a little bit excited for when Rory is old enough to appreciate Butlins. I’m sure when the time comes that excitement will be short lived!

#KCACOLS

Feeling Mum Yet
Guest

haha, I was laughing so much reading it! I have never been to a caravan park, but after reading this we might never go there… Thanks for a laugh! #KCACOLS

Kate Eccles
Guest

To be honest holidays anywhere with kids are kind of the same, well the meltdowns are anyway! A mum at school summed it up perfectly same parenting sh*t just a different postcode lol!! #KCACOLS

Silly Mummy
Guest

Haha – I’ve never been to a holiday camp. I’m not sure how well I would cope as I’m not a very participation orientated person, but I can see why people like them! #KCACOLS

Rachel George, Ordinary Hopes
Guest

I have never been to a holiday camp. I always wanted to go to Butlins as a child but my dad said no, then my husband took over with saying no! After reading this, I still fancy it! #KCACOLS

Epril
Guest

We haven’t tried holiday camping yet but this seems fun. Thank you for sharing. #kcacols

Musings of a tired mummy...zzz...
Guest

I have always been a little bit put off holiday camps as they seem to be very intense. I think the kids would love them but I like holidays where we explore the local area, buildings, history, food and culture. #kcacols

Nicola wiggins
Guest

No word of a lie, I’m actually writing this from a Haven caravan in Weymouth 😂 and God am I already feeling the pain. At least it’s only for a week then I can go back to normal life 😕 #kcacols

Natalie
Guest

This made me giggle~all good fun though x #kcacols

ohmummymia
Guest

Sounds like you had really great time! I’ve never been in caravan and I don’t know how it looks like to be on caravan holidays but my friend is doing it every year and she loves it
#KCACOLS

Topdogdays
Guest

This kind of holiday is perfect for kids and we had lots of caravan holidays in the UK when we were kids. I loved them.