judgement

2017 – When every day is judgement day.

2017 has brought with it an increase in access to the internet, which, in my opinion, has increased our so called “knowledge”. We all think we are so damn knowledgeable about everything. Parents are literally the worst culprits of this.

Looking at my examples below, you’ll come to the conclusion that as parents we can’t do right for doing wrong. There will always be someone who doesn’t agree with what you are doing or have done. Is it any of their business? No! Are they with you 24/7? Doubtful! Should you give a toss what they think? Absolutely not! Will our children all turn out ok in the end? More than likely.

And those that supposedly turn out perfect may no doubt make some poor choices in adulthood. Perhaps they’ll make choices that mess up their lives and make us judge them moreover. There are many, many ways to live and grow. Very few are the “wrong way”. Please just stop judging.

Stop judging yourself, judging others. Stop making snide comments and passing hurtful looks. Instead try offering help to a parent that looks like they are struggling. Try offering praise to someone who looks like they are doing a “good job” by your standards. Appreciate that there are other ways to parent, and enquire with the person politely about their method. You may actually find a “better” method for your own parenting/grand parenting.

Any of these sound familiar?

Did you see that mum in the cafe, bottle feeding her baby? Poor kid is missing out on all those nutrients. Why doesn’t she breastfeed. Why doesn’t she want to give the best to her baby?

Did you see that mum in the cafe, breastfeeding her baby? Attention seeking she was. Getting her boobs out for everyone to see. Just so she can make the rest of us feel inadequate like we aren’t doing the best for our babies.

Did you speak to that that mum at the park? 5 kids she has and she wants more! She’s so selfish. Those kids will never get the attention and love they need with that many to look after!

Did you speak to that mum at the park? Her little boy is an only child and she doesn’t want anymore! She’s so selfish. That child is going to miss out on so much without a sibling to share it with.

Did you see that mum at the zoo? All her children drinking juice and eating chocolate and sweets. More fool her. All their teeth are probably rotten and it’s all her fault.

Did you see that mum at the zoo? All her children drinking were drinking water and eating homemade sugar free muffins. More fool her. First chance they get they will be stuffing their faces secretly with sweets, chocolate and fizzy drinks. And they’ll miss out at birthday parties. It’s all her fault.

My gosh did you see that mum letting her kid run along on the pavement? He could’ve run in the road and had an accident any minute. I was on edge just watching. She’s so irresponsible. (I’ve actually heard this one).

My gosh did you see that mum making her kid hold her hand and wear reins whilst walking along? Give the kid some space or he’ll never learn. She’s making a rod for her own back.

Did you see that mum ignoring her child and looking at her phone? Look at your kid for crying out loud! Watch him play.

Did you see that mum following her child on all the play equipment? Step back and let him breathe! Let him play by himself.

Did you see that mum shouting at her child in the supermarket? You should never speak to a child like that! She should always remain calm and composed.

Did you see that mum in the supermarket letting her child get away with lying on the floor screaming whilst she quietly stood there? She didn’t do anything! She’s teaching him it’s ok to be a spoilt brat.

The list goes on and on. Moral of this post…we all do things different. Every child is different and has their own needs. By all means if you are genuinely concerned for the safeguarding of a child then please take action by reporting to the appropriate authorities.

If you believe you may be guilty of being judgemental of your fellow mama, try our three simple steps;

(1) Take a moment to think of some of the reasons this mum is doing what she is doing. Appreciate that she knows her own children and her own mind. She may be having an off day. She’s made her own choices after weighing up the facts for herself.

(2) Close your eyes and walk away. It’s not your child. It’s not your way. If there’s no safeguarding issue. You are just being a bitch. Mind your own business.

(3) Do you remember when you had your first child and when you no doubt did exactly the same thing she did? You’ve since changed your style but it doesn’t make your choice any better. It’s YOUR choice for YOUR child at THAT time.

Just to be clear. None of the above opinions are my own. Thankfully I don’t hang in circles where opinions like this are expressed. You only have to click on the comments of most Facebook stories to see this type of know-it-all negativity.

Do you think we are giving each other too much of a hard time? I know I give MYSELF a hard enough time. I don’t have anything left to berate others and wouldn’t dare. We won’t judge here.

 

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

42 thoughts on “2017 – When every day is judgement day.”

    1. I must admit I may be guilty of a little mental judging at times but I never let it out.

      Keyboard warriors are just sad,insecure, and jealous people. We all have something to learn from each other. Even if it’s just how NOT to behave.

      Thanks for stopping by.
      #blogcrush

  1. They are now doing studies on why people are so mean on the internet and why so vicious about it. It’s an interesting look into a very ugly side of human nature. 3 kids in, my judgement has def died down! #KALCOLS

    1. It totally takes one to know one huh. Once you become a parent you judge others a lot less. If at all. Although I have found older people have short memeories of when their kids were young and they suddenly become all judgey again.

      Thanks for stopping by.

      #KCACOLS

    1. Oh blimey has it not already started. I was told I shouldn’t be sitting cross legged, should be grateful for sleep, sitting still, going out because I would t be doing that once baby got here. Everyone is suddenly a flaming expert once you become preganant lol.

      Thanks for stopping by and best of luck with it all.

      #KCACOLS

  2. Great post, and very true. People also forget that what they are seeing is a single snapshot in time. The kids who you see eating sweets may be having their once weekly treat – it doesn’t mean they eat like that all the time. It’s like judging a book by its cover. I always try to remember that I might disagree with how someone is doing something, but it’s irrelevant if they aren’t doing it to my child.

    And… imagine how boring life would be if we were all the same anyway! #KCACOLS
    Caro recently posted…Me and Mine – August 2017My Profile

    1. Totally. Unless what they are doing is directly impacting on yours or your child’s life but still, make a helpful suggestion. We can all take some critisicm if it’s constructive and worthy.

      Thanks for stopping by. #KCACOLS

  3. I hate judgey people let people do what they have to!I had a woman tell my girl she shouldn’t be wearing a blue hoody because it’s for boys and give me a look. What the hell though?! #kcacols

    1. I don’t know if people like to fill he silence with complete nonsense. I know awkwardness makes people say stupid things. Honestly though what was that woman hoping to achieve by that comment. Did it really make her day any better by saying that to you! Such nonsense.

      Thanks for stopping by.
      #KCACOLS

  4. The internet brings out the worst in people all the time. I suppose because they can hide behind a screen they say what they want. I don’t know why they can be so judgemental and feel it’s their right to do so. We are all the best parents we can be and we all do it differently. There is no right way! xx

    #KCACOLS

  5. We all do our best in the harsh world of parenting and that’s just it, we do our best. Others might do things differently, it doesn’t make one right or wrong so I’m with you, best not to judge. Popping by from #KCACOLS

  6. This is so true, even when people think they are being helpful by advising other parents they don’t realise that every child is individual and what works for one doesn’t necessarily work for another! #kcacols

  7. SO true!! I’ve forgot what it was like to live in a world without judgement, it was probably 1998 before I discovered the internet!! It’s awful how much this happens, more so as parents! #KCACOLS

  8. I wonder if sometimes people judge other people as a way of trying to deal with their own insecurities. There’s just no need for it though, is there. We’re all just doing our best, making the choices we think is right for our families. x #KCACOLS

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge